


luck, if you ever were a lady to begin with

by oneorangeshoelace



Category: Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Suicide mention, Underage Drinking, pot mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 10:01:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6952099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oneorangeshoelace/pseuds/oneorangeshoelace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A year and two months after their skip day. Ferris and Cameron are back after their first year of college. Cameron is still done with being careful.</p>
            </blockquote>





	luck, if you ever were a lady to begin with

"Can I just say, buddy, it is great to be back hanging out with you again." Ferris said, leaning back against the hill. "College is great, but it's not--well, it's not drinking beers with Cameron Frye. You know? Hey. Cheers." He grinned and held out his beer bottle, and Cameron awkwardly clinked his against Ferris'. 

"Yeah. Cheers." Cameron swallowed. His heart was pounding in his chest. "Hey, listen, there's something I wanted to talk to you about." He idly wondered if his heart rate wasn't just nerves, and he was having a heart attack. Was nineteen too young to have a heart attack? Would dying of heart failure be preferable to having this conversation? He was an idiot for wanting to bring this up. But now Ferris knew something was on his mind, because Cameron had said so. But Ferris had probably already known. 

"Yeah, of course. I thought something might be on your mind," Ferris said easily. Shit. How did he always know? "You've gotten a lot quieter in the past ten minutes. I figured you were psyching yourself up to say something." 

Cameron decided to stop having thoughts that Ferris could respond to. That made it hard to decide what thoughts to have. He stayed silent. 

"Cameron! Come on. If you don't tell me, I'm going to start guessing, and I don't think you want that." Ferris seemed supremely unconcerned. He was watching the sunset, not even looking at Cameron.

Cameron reminded himself that he wasn't a coward anymore.

"I'm bisexual," he whispered, and frowned. That was supposed to have been louder.

Ferris glanced over briefly. "Didn't hear you, buddy."

"I'm bisexual," Cameron said hoarsely. 

Ferris went completely still, and Cameron fantasized briefly about killing himself. Then Ferris smiled. "Cool. That's good. I'm proud of you, buddy. How long have you known?"

Cameron stared at him.

"Cameron." Ferris nudged him with his shoulder. "Cameron, I want you to know that I have no problem with this at all, I have many gay and bisexual friends, and I want to hear any and all lurid details from your first year of college that you have apparently been holding out on me about. Because I have told you everything I can about having sex with Sloane, and you have told me nothing. You owe me."

Cameron tipped his head to the side. "You want to hear about me having sex with a guy? Why?"

"Well, if you must know, it's because I am also bisexual, and the subject of you, a man, having sex with a man, is just as interesting as the idea of you having sex with a woman." 

"You're shitting me. You are absolutely shitting me." Ferris glanced away from him, jaw tightening. "No--Ferris! Come on, man, how long have you known?"

Ferris still wasn't looking at him. "Five years?"

"Five YEARS? And I'm the one holding out on you?" 

"Look, fine, whatever," Ferris started.

"No, you're right, it's fine, it's whatever. Look, I'll tell you everything about it, it'll be great. Look, it was this guy Bryce, he was a psychology major, we were talking in my room one day when he kissed me and put his hands under my shirt and I realized that's all I had wanted for the past three weeks, and then at some point he asked me to go steady, and--Oh. Ohhhh." 

Ferris glanced at him sharply. "'Oh,' what?"

"What else do you want to tell me?" 

Ferris exhaled. "I hate it when you do that."

"Well, hello, pot, this is kettle." 

Ferris made a noise halfway between a snicker and a huff. "So--so listen. If I ask Sloane, and she's okay with it, would you--wanna make out sometime?"

"Uh--"

"With me, that is, Well, with Sloane too, I guess, if you want, but that's a different conversation."

"Well."

"Wait, I'm sorry, you said something about a boyfriend, didn't you? Sorry." 

"No, that's--that's over."

"Aw, no, what happened?"

"We read each other a lot of poetry, we had a lot of sex, we smoked a lot of pot, and then he dumped me for someone less neurotic." 

"Ouch. Wait, Cameron Frye had sex and did drugs?"

"Stop. No, I entered into a homosexual relationship with a psychology major so we could hold hands chastely and go for promenades in the park together." 

"...Are psychology majors known for doing a lot of drugs?"

"Come on, Ferris, it's 1987. Everyone knows psych majors do a lot of drugs. He was one of the tamer ones."

"Well. At any rate--I'm proud of you, Cameron. I really am. And thanks for telling me. I didn't say that before."

Cameron was silent.

"You still want to answer my question, but you're anxious that too much time has elapsed since I asked it."

"Yes."

"So, uh, what's your answer?"

"Wait, are you nervous?" Cameron asked, getting excited. 

"Wh--Yes, of course I'm nervous! I could have just ruined my best and longest friendship with a stupid horny question that I asked with no idea of how you're going to respond, so, yes, I'm nervous."

"You don't know how I'm going to respond?" Cameron was bordering on gleeful now.

"No, Cameron. I have found my ability to predict your movements somewhat hampered since the day in our senior year when we skipped school and you pretended to drown yourself to scare the shit out of me, and then kicked the hell out of your dad's priceless car. These days, I only know what you'll do about 95% of the time, which, let me tell you, is extremely weird, and more than a little aggravating, I'll be frank with you."

"I scared the shit out of you?" Cameron was grinning now.

"Cameron, this time you known I'm waiting for you to answer. Just tell me." 

"Best and longest friendship. I'm going to file that one away," Cameron said.

"Cameron."

"Yes," Cameron said finally.

"Yes?"

Cameron looked him in the eye. "Yes, I'm interested in making out with you, and I would be damn interested in making out with Sloane too if she wants to, and I'm interested in doing anything with either of you that you're both okay with."

"Okay!" Ferris said brightly. 

"You knew what I was going to say, you piece of shit. You irresistible, incorrigible piece of shit. You knew I was going to say that the whole time!"

"Aw, no, I didn't, Cameron. Honest Abe," Ferris said, turning on the doe eyes that had never once fooled Cameron.

"No, you knew what I was going to say," Cameron continued, unperturbed, "and here's why: It's because whatever Ferris Bueller wants to happen will happen. Sometimes it takes a little longer, but the margin of error does not exist."

"Past performance is no guarantee of future results," Ferris said, managing to sound wise, humble, and wholesome all at the same time.

"You don't really believe that," Cameron snorted.

"No, I don't," Ferris said easily. "I am a god. I control the universe itself. You know how I know that?"

"How?" Cameron said, just because he knew Ferris wanted him to.

Ferris poked a finger into Cameron's chest. "Because you just told me you think I'm irresistible."

"Aw, shut up," Cameron said, laughing.

"Make me," Ferris said, and his eyes flashed. Then he remembered, "Well, not--"

"Without," Cameron continued.

"Written," Ferris said.

"Permission," Cameron guessed.

"From my,"

"Fiancee."

They grinned at each other, pleased that their skill for finishing each other's sentences hadn't dulled in their time away from each other.

"Well, I mean," Ferris said thoughtfully, "I was going to say 'girlfriend,' but I guess she is my fiancee, since we're definitely going to get married. Yeah. Well--Cameron, this suddenly feels very urgent, so I'm going to go and call her and find out when I can see her next, and when I see her, I'm going to ask her. Yeah. Or maybe I'll just go straight to her house and ask her now. Either way--I'll see you, Cameron."

"See you, Ferris. I'd tell you good luck, but you've never needed it before."

Ferris batted his eyelashes. "But you could give me something for luck."

Cameron laughed a little, and then, impulsively, took one of Ferris' hands in both of his. He considered it for a moment, made a big show of appraising it, turning it so the palm faced up, and then back again. Finally, he lifted it up, and pressed it to his lips.

He had barely lowered it when Ferris suddenly threw his arms around Cameron.

"You're my best friend," Ferris said, his face muffled against Cameron's chest.

"Yeah, I know."

Ferris drew back a little to look at him. "You're also an asshole."

Cameron laughed, almost too loud. "Yeah, I know. No, that's why you like me. We're very similar in that respect."

That made Ferris laugh. He had still been studying Cameron, but then he stepped back. "Okay, bye, asshole. I have to go--I have urgent business. I have to go ask my girlfriend-fiancee-whatever if she'll let me hook up with another man."

Cameron raised his eyebrows. "That sounds like a lucky man."

Ferris grinned. "Yeah, he is pretty lucky. It's just taking him a goddamn while to figure it out."

Then he was gone.

Cameron, to give himself something to do, laid down in the cool grass. The sun had gone down, and he wondered if dew would collect on him if he stayed here long enough. He tried to balance his beer bottle on his stomach just to see if he could. He could.

He wondered how he was ever going to survive the wait until he knew Sloane's answer. 

His lips still sort of tingled where they had touched the back of Ferris' hand.

**Author's Note:**

> OOPS.
> 
> Happy 30th anniversary to this absolutely iconic movie that I've loved for as long as I can remember.
> 
> I bought the movie to rewatch it since the anniversary just happened, and then after I finished watching it, this...just happened. Because the three of them are so in sync. It's gorgeous. 
> 
> Yeah, there's almost certainly going to be a part 2 or something.
> 
> If you want, find me on tumblr under the same username as this site.


End file.
